Friday, September 19

Couldn't control myself so I sent him a message again asking him to reply if he got the card. I messaged him yesterday as well but I didn't get a reply. Anyway, he messaged me back & he seemed a little confused & all...& he said he got the card but he didn't know what to do. I don't know what he meant by that...I mean, it's obvious isn't it? It was on the note sent to him along with the card. Let. Me. Know. When. He. Gets. It. It was once again in yesterday's message. Let. Me. Know. Which part of it doesn't he understand?! But I can't blame him if he's freaked. I asked for it. & then I was trying so desperately to hold on to the conversation. But he was so desperate to end it. So everything was over in 3 messages. Sad. Real sad. P.A.T.H.E.T.I.C.

Pathetic, just like what I was supposed to act like today in Speech Comm. Some pathetic woman hanging on to this guy who obviously doesn't want her or something. She was shouting, crying, begging, whining, yelling...familiar aye? Very familiar...

Yeah, received another project from Mr 'I'm from MENSA but I can't read the time' Choy. It's a huge project. & we're only given 3 weeks. So it's me, Tiara, Darrelle, Trina & Farhan...let's cross our fingers & hope for the best, since almost the whole class got an E for the 1st project. Mr 'MENSA' Choy is too good for all of us. *snort*

Our LVP script's coming along fine. The script's pretty good...what I'm worried about is the actually filming. I was thinking that we may not be able to wrap up everything in 2 days due to the many complications in the film. Ah well, we'll see. LVP's defintely way more interesting than Graph Comm. Heck. Even the cracks in the ceiling are more interesting than Mr Choy.

So for Z, we were closer, but for now, he seems to have drifted to another group...& I'm kinda losing hope. In fact, I think I never had hope in the very beginning. Wishful thinking on my part. I knew that. I just couldn't believe in it. But come to think about it, his expectations seem to be seriously high, it's almost like he's unattainable. He's not like really outstanding in any way. It's just something special about him. He radiates something. He seems to just lure you in...witty, interesting, intriguing. But way out of my reach. Yeah, out of my reach. Miss Plain Jane. *knock knock* Wake up your idea, Sam. Why would he like you? I'll recover...I'll move on...a small part of me will be with Z, but I'll move on. I've always been moving on, drifting around aimlessly after him. So this is nothing new to me. I'll just drift around again, like some tiny fish lost in the big sea. & mope & think back & become really nostalgic...& then start doing all sorta weird stuff thinking of him. It always come back to him. It doesn't matter how many guys, how long or what I do. It could take me 1 week, or 2 years. It just comes around, back to him.

I'll be standing at the edge of the earth
Hoping that someday you'll come back again
I'll be standing at the edge of the earth hoping for someday

Blessid Union Of Souls [Standing At The Edge Of The Earth]

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