Tuesday, October 4

I haven't had one of those horrid horrid dreams in a few days, & I thought I could have some peaceful sleepless nights.

But no, I had a terrible nightmare yesterday.

I dreamt that I was hurting my brother. In my dream, my parents (whom I have never seen before but in my dream, I knew them) were separated & we were living with my mom, who in a weird twisted situation, ended up with another woman. & then one fine day, my dad came back & wanted to stay with us. & for some strange reason, one of us has to leave the family & we all ganged up & my brother was to be the sacrificed one.

I guess I was selfish, so I came up with a whole list of reasons for him to leave. I was harsh, cruel & utterly heartless.

But when my brother (who had a stunned look of disbelief & extreme hurt) went to his room to pack, I followed, threw myself at him & sobbed my heart out.

I could feel the tears leaking out from the corners of my eyes onto the pillow. But I couldn't wake up.

I finally woke up when my alarm went off. & I was left with a heavy heart.

I really need more cold milk.

(& I think I actually do love my brother a lot.)

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